Monday, February 14, 2005

the break-up

Why do relationships, rather, the ending of a relationship need to be so very painful? You end up saying all these things you end up regretting later or you wish you had said something that you didn't and then the mind games begin. To me, this is the worst part of a break-up. This may sound selfish, but this is just how I feel...it's not the actual loss of the person that is so difficult to deal with, but the mind games. Now I am not talking about playing mind games with your very recent ex, I am talking about the mind games that you play with yourself. At first it isn't so bad; simple thoughts like "what is he doing" or "is he thinking of me"...but then as the days progress the thoughts turn into "is he seeing anyone" or "if only i had done this differently".

Tonight, on Valentines Day, I got dumped. Apparently, I need too much attention. My advise is, don't start out by showering me with tons of attention, flowers and love and then drop it over night because something new and exciting came around. In my case...it was the World of Warcraft. This game is so addicting, my belief is that it is ruining several relationships. As
a massively multiplayer online game, World of Warcraft enables thousands of players to come together online and battle against the world and each other. Your character developes the more you play and the more you play, the more you need to play. So, that was the begninning of the end for my relationship with "him". It was sad, but onward.

I have decided that I will not let this get to me. After all, I am nearly 27 and have a lot of experience with break-ups. So, I earased all of his sweet messages on my cell phone and his number, deleted him from my instant messenger, and have opted not to talk it through with the girlfriends. It's not that I don't care, because I really do...I just do not have time to get upset and depressed over this. I need to regain my dignity and self respect. I am compassionate, smart, sexy/beautiful, and I have done things that most people will never do in life time. Been around the world about 6 times, ran marathons, lived in refugee camps...you know, I've done some shit. And I am such a princess~

This blog, (my first) is a documentation of my journey to find love and happiness (isn't that what everyone wants?). If anyone has tips or stories to share...be my guest : )

4 Comments:

Blogger jolie said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

10:15 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Good luck with the journey, I am curious to see how it turns out :)

10:16 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't think there is anything wrong with getting upset and depressed... it only goes to show your feelings were real. What's more important is what you do after. I believe the most dignified thing to do is to move on after a break up. Normally, we feel self-destructive after a break up, but instead, focus your energy on something productive or positive... like going around the world or running the marathon. I'm sure it may be painful, but it will be something you will just laugh about in the future. What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger.

2:51 PM  
Blogger just another fish in the sea said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

12:23 PM  

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